If you want this choice position, have a cheery disposition
Rosy cheeks, no warts, play games, all sorts
You must be kind, you must be witty, very sweet and fairly pretty
Take us on outings, give us treats, sing songs, bring sweets
Never be cross or cruel, never give us castor oil or gruel
Love us as a son and daughter, and never smell of barley water
If you won’t scold and dominate us, we will never give you cause to hate us
We won’t hide your spectacles. so you can’t see
Put toads in your bed, or pepper in your tea
Hurry, leader! Many thanks.
Sincerely,
The Australian people